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Bible teacher Kelly Needham debunks our world's constricted, small view of friendship and casts a richer, more life-giving, biblical vision for friendship as God meant it to be.

As the family unit grows more unstable and the average age of marriage increases, a shift is taking place in our culture: for many people, friends now play the role of family. And just as with family relationships, our friendships often don't turn out quite as we envisioned or hoped, and we wonder, Is there a better way to do this?

In Fri

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Book ID Asin: 1978677073
Book Title: Friend-ish
Book Author: Kelly Needham
Book Format and Price:
Book Format Name: Kindle
Book Format Price: $12.99
Book Format Name: Audiobook
Book Format Price: $0.00
Book Format Name: Paperback
Book Format Price: $15.76
Book Format Name: Spiral-bound
Book Format Price: $24.59
Book Format Name: MP3 CD
Book Format Price: $22.22
Book Price: $22.22
Book Category: Books, Self-Help, Relationships and unknown
Book Rating: 500 ratings

Friend-ish by Kelly Needham Book Review

Name: Panda Incognito
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: WiseRefreshingandUnique
Date: Reviewed in the United States on September 9, 2019
Review: One of my Facebook friends recently shared an article by this author that shared some of the main points and content from this book. As soon as I got to the end, I preordered this on Amazon, because I wanted it immediately, and there was no way I was going to wait six months to inter-library loan this. I'm so glad that I did, and it was well worth the money, especially since I can now loan it out to people.Friendship is one of the most important things in my life, and always has been, but very few resources exist on how to navigate it faithfully and well through different pitfalls, challenges, and life changes. By the grace of God, I have managed to avoid codependent friendships and have pushed back against urges for jealousy and possessiveness in my relationships, but I wish that I'd had more than marriage-advice-turned-into-friendship-advice to help me navigate conflict, disappointment, the temptation of idolatry, and difficult feelings.This book is everything I wish I could have read as a teenager. It is incredibly well-written, personal, biblically grounded, and refreshing. It was emotionally overwhelming for me to read it at times, especially as the chapters on dysfunctional friendships brought back my undying rage from how other people's toxic best friendships affected me in youth group several years ago, but I appreciate the conviction of how unforgiving I have been, and saw myself in some of the relationship pitfalls. A couple sections made me cry because I felt like they were talking directly to me about issues that are largely invisible to Christian culture. When you've only found two helpful, targeted resources on a topic, there's something unspeakably reassuring about reading chapters that feel like they were written to you and affirm the choices and beliefs you synthesized about your experiences.This book is primarily written for women, but it also shares some stories from men's friendships, and I love this, both because it welcomes in a male audience and shows women that men's friendship experiences aren't very different from their own. Overall, this book is inclusive and accessible to men and women, singles and marrieds, teenagers and adults, and people with and without kids. I appreciate the attention and care that the author put into making this book as theologically sound, gospel-oriented, practical, and accessible as it is. I'm going to recommend this to so many people, and I already know who I'm going to loan my copy to first.As a closing note, I have two small complaints about this book. One is a single paragraph that was dismissive towards online friendships. Yes, we shouldn't overextend ourselves and think we can maintain meaningful relationships with everyone we've met in our whole lives, and yes, we need local friends who are physically present with us, but almost all of my deepest friendships began online, and I consider that a blessing from God. Some of these friendships exist over long distances and only occasionally have opportunities for face-to-face contact, but they are still profoundly meaningful to me, and I have also traditionally used Facebook chats to keep up with local friends when we can't see each other in person. This author is writing from her own experience and perspective as a thirty-something, so I'll give her lots of grace for not understanding the dynamics of my teenage years, but because of my peers' fast-paced, over-scheduled, hectic lives and the limitations of who had a driving permit, I wouldn't have been able to maintain friendships well outside of church without the grace of Facebook chat and Gmail video chat. I never turned to the Internet because I thought I was infinite and could be friends with everyone; I turned to the Internet to maintain my closest friendships during the times when we weren't able to connect in coffee shops.My second, more minor complaint is that the author never provides examples of books or movies that display the beauty of healthy friendships. I totally agree with what she wrote about the toxic, misleading messages about friendships and BFFs within popular culture, but I wish that she had given examples of alternatives to this in the media. Granted, most of my examples date back to the early 1900s, since I grew up reading post-Victorian children's literature, but there are more modern examples! Given the enduring popularity of Lord of the Rings, I was somewhat surprised that a book on friendship that so often criticized media portrayals of friendship never mentioned this as a profoundly refreshing corrective.Overall, this book is incredibly gospel-focused, helpful, and full of wisdom, providing guidance for how Christians can pursue friendships that avoid common pitfalls and are ultimately grounded in Christ. I hope that someday, there will be more resources like this, but until then, this book is gloriously unique and I will recommend it endlessly.

Name: annonymous
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Goodconceptsovershadowedbypersonalbeliefs
Date: Reviewed in the United States on April 11, 2020
Review: I like the book and have recommended it but I recommend it with a warning. There are some amazing and Biblical concepts in here but they are overshadowed with personal beliefs and misunderstanding of how different personalities operate. First and foremost, the most important part of this book is that we are to love Jesus and love others. Yes...1,000% yes. Second, all relationships should be selfless and if our focus is to love Jesus and love others then there should be little problems. Third, friendship should never resemble marriage nor take the place of marriage nor should it ever held in higher regard to marriage. Absolutely true. Fourth, be a friend to everyone and make room for everyone is a great idea and in an ideal world absolutely should be how it is especially with professing Christians.Here is where the author goes off in her own personal beliefs. She defines cuddling as a form of marital intimacy when physical affection can absolutely be a personality difference. She all but defines best friendships as toxic and non-Chrsitian. A lot of scientific study has gone in understanding the importance of having best friends. Even Jesus had three best friends and twelve intimate friends that he hung out with all of the time. It is vital that writers who are trying to define friendship avoid putting their own definition of friendship based on their personality type. I get it, she shared deep personal testimonies of having codependent friendships that were damaged by it. It sadly gets wrapped up that expecting reciprocation is toxic and this is probably where I went from giving this book 5 *'s and recommending it to pulling my recommendations down. Honestly there is a shame tone in having or wanting close, intimate friendships and this is just now Biblical nor is it scientifically sound.As an educated society it should be expected that people read everything with bias and ask God for clarification. A good, wholesome, methodical book will have a few personal opinions thrown in but personal beliefs are better stated as that. This book is often using personal beliefs as facts on friendship. Indicating that expecting reciprocal friendships is codependency (not the words, I am summing) can enhance the abuse culture.Loving Jesus and loving others cannot take precedence over being careful in protecting hearts and minds. Some people will take vulnerability, openness, good-hearted people and use the information to attempt to destroy them.Overall, the message of loving Jesus and loving others, don't use friendship as a replacement for marriage, do not put your friendships above your marriage, be selfless, be ok with friendships fading (because they often do), and be a friend are EXCELLENT. Calling people to be healthy friends, to be upfront and forward, to be willing to call out a friend, to be willing to accept accountability and to give accountability...all important for Godly friendships.I still say with the warnings, read it and take heart the overall concepts of the book. Friendship is a gift from God so it is important to seek healthy friendships.

Name: ian
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: AmustreadforChristianfriendships
Date: Reviewed in the United States on August 27, 2019
Review: Friend-ish is such a wonderful book about how to have strong, meaningful, God honoring friendships. Kelly has done a great job in writing a book that I think is so needed for Christian friendships. It is very easy to read, but I found myself putting it down a few times so I could really internalize the truths Kelly was writing about before moving on. I am so thankful for Kelly and this book! I am excited to start looking at my friendships in a new light as I try to honor God and be a better friend to the friends I have, and reach out to start new ones.

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