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“I hated my father—really, really hated him. I hated working for him and I hated being around him. I hated it when he walked through the front door at home. And we feared him from the moment he pulled up in front of the house in his car.”

So writes conservative firebrand and popular radio host Larry Elder. For ten years Elder and his father did not talk to each other.

When they finally did, the conversation went on for eight hours—eight hours that took Elder on his father’s journey from the Jim Crow South, to service in the Marine Corps, to starting


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Book ID Asin: 162157797X
Book Title: A Lot Like Me: A Father and Son's Journey to Reconciliation
Book Author: Larry Elder
Book Format and Price:
Book Format Name: Kindle
Book Format Price: $9.99
Book Format Name: Paperback
Book Format Price: $12.89
Book Price: $12.89
Book Category: Books, Biographies & Memoirs, Community & Culture and unknown
Book Rating: 422 ratings

A Lot Like Me: A Father and Son's Journey to Reconciliation by Larry Elder Book Review

Name: larry j gardner
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Reading this book has made me a better dad, husband and man.
Date: Reviewed in the United States on June 21, 2021
Review: Family life can sometimes feel like you're taking a submarine beyond its collapse depth. In “A Lot Like Me” Larry Elder masterfully limns the tools for family life in the same way civilizations have passed on the gnosis they intend to survive the test of time, storytelling.

"Storytelling is the oldest form of teaching. Stories define us, shape us, control us, and make us. Not every human culture in the world is literate, but every single culture tells stories” more

Larry covers a story American history oft neglects, the forgiveness and love given to a paralyzed George Wallace when he visits Dexter Avenue Baptist Church in Montgomery, Alabama in 1978. It depicts a healing moment for our nation, and reading “A Lot Like Me” is a healing moment for our families. pg 255/256

Ancient Greece was a paradigm our Founding Fathers built America around more ; and the “oikos” or "family” was the key unit of Greek civilization. more James Wilson, signer of the Declaration of Independence, described family as “the true origin of society” and sociologists describe family as the single most important influence in a child’s life.

My wife and I often discuss in mutual shock, that society does not engage in more discussion about what will be the biggest decision of your life and that is the decision to create human life. We decided NOT to have children, but in a short week of indecision, fate declared its will, and now we have a daughter that is the joy in my life. However, no one gave me a guide on how to be a patriarch and I never wanted the responsibility of a family. As I’ve adapted to a life I once thought I didn’t want, reading the timeless wisdom in Larry Elder’s book “A Lot Like Me” has made me a better dad, husband and man.

“I hated my father - really, really hated him.” pg 3 “When Dad walked through the front door, he was usually scowling - a massive dark, hulk.”

“The louder we hollered, the harder he swung. Our welts were visible for days.” pg 4

Reading this I felt a sickening terror in the pit my stomach that I had unconsciously swore I’d never feel again.

“Dad came home angry, sat down angry, ate dinner angry, and watched television angry.” pg 224

I knew this energy, but it was from my mother.

“-normal was intimidation. Normal was tense. Normal was not knowing whether you would say something that would set him off. Normal was hate.” pg 6

By page 5 I hated Larry’s father too and was giddy with anticipation for the showdown on page 63 between the bullied and the bully when Larry confronts his father after they haven’t spoken in 10 years. Larry lays into his dad telling him everything he ever wanted to say.

His father's response:

Randolph- “I promised myself when I had kids I was not going to treat them like my daddy did me.”

Larry- “And do you think you treated us better than your father did?”

Randolph- “I know I did.”

And he did. I grew to love Randolph the more I read, especially his sayings, insights and moral code.

The book created a portal for me to see how my daughter would perceive the toxic anger I hold in myself that seeps out around the edges.

My wife almost left me when she was 8 months pregnant because I worked 20 hours a day 7 days a week. For years I lashed out when confronted with how I was constantly angry and irritated. I called it driven. I’d be damned if I’d let them take my anger away. Don’t they know anger drives you, makes you tough? Don’t they know it’s how I pay our bills? That it's what fuels me everyday to take the beatings life gives and get back up for more?

I didn't complete high school and I wouldn’t have risen from sleeping in my car and then a garage, to being the only white busboy on Sunset Blvd in 1998, to owning my own business and eventually living a block from the beach in Laguna Beach without the anger, which had been my fuel. I loved my anger.

But as I read “A Lot Like Me” I saw through the lens of Larry and Randolph, the toll that anger takes on those around you and then the happiness as Larry heals and unites his family. First bringing his mother and father together in laughter and understanding, then his brother Kirk and his father. I saw a glimmer of light for my own angry soul. What if I could do everything I’m doing without the sweet rage that had been my closest companion for so long? What if I could be happy and allow myself to enjoy those moments of life I had worked so hard to create? And how would that change in myself, affect those I love?

Randolph Elder said, “Ain’t how long you live. It’s what you did with it.”

It was with this new awareness, that I realized I wanted to love and be loved by my family without the weight of my anger. This is what “A Lot Like Me” did for me. It is a generational guide to family life and if society truly wanted to prepare kids for life and save them from large therapy bills, “A Lot Like Me” would be required reading before high school.

Larry Elder is now America’s Patriarch, and if we adhere to the wisdom in his family memoir, the future that strong families usher in will fulfill the dream that is America.

Name: Becky Colson
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: healing
Date: Reviewed in the United States on December 10, 2022
Review: I enjoyed every moment of this books. A story told well. Thank you Larry Elder for sharing with us your words!

Name: Kalman Goodman
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Amazing story
Date: Reviewed in the United States on August 26, 2022
Review: This book is amazing.
No matter what your relationship with your parents was / is, this book gives prospective and a look at a life that some one as close to you as you father lived and you know nothing about.
In addition, you might want to talk things out instead of storming off, you might learn a lot more than you thought.
I bought the book because I heard Mr. Elder mention it on Tim Pool's podcast and I'm glad I did.
Recommended!!!

Name: Hope Holland
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Times are hard. Good inexpensive ways to eat.
Date: Reviewed in the United States on September 4, 2022
Review: Lots of "cheap but good and good for you" meals that I recognize as being handed down from the Depression and WWII where women had to make good meals on limited budgets. There is nothing wrong with tasty penny pinching and this shows how to do it!

Name: George Kakouris
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: You think your life was tough? Want to change places with Larry then?
Date: Reviewed in the United States on April 10, 2022
Review: This book may open your eyes to what some parents do for their families and when life is not always so easy.

Name: watchinoutforusall
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Contents of this book are the exact same as 'A Lot Like Me'
Date: Reviewed in the United States on January 23, 2020
Review: I was unable to find the book Dear Father, Dear Son by Larry Elder for less than $85.00-so I finally gave up and ordered the audio version-it came and I listened to about 1/2 of it-I decided I better order his other books while they are available-When they arrived I sat down to read, 'A Lot Like Me'-the contents of that book were very familiar to me-but how could that be? It didn't take me long to realize that the contents of 'A LOT LIKE ME' was the very same as the words in the Audio of Like Father, Like Son-Like Father Like Son was published in 2012- A Lot Like Me was published in 2018-How does that work? Same book, but different titles? I have enjoyed the book so much- but am curious about this- I spent a lot of time trying to run that book down before giving up and ordering the audio version-discovering that the two are the same except for the title???

Name: Datu pula
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: full of emotion and reflection
Date: Reviewed in the United States on July 19, 2019
Review: I first read a book by larry elder back in 2000 called 10 things you cant say in america and it made me an admirer of this man...13 years later i stumbled across him again on you tube as well as CNN and grew an even greater respect for him... In many ways this book reminds me of my childhood with my father growing up poor during the depression in Savannah Georgia under jim crow...my father was also a marine sargeant who went to boot camp in parris island s. c. and eventually settled in camp lejune, n. c.
He was also a no nonsense father who was molded under conditions that would fill up three albums of blues music.. Yet he prospered. The parallels although not uncommon for men back then who started from humble beginnings to navigating through racism and far more obstacles that none of us enconter in todays America...kudos Mr. Elder! This was an inspirational read.

Name: Amazon Customer
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Reminds me of my father and grandfather
Date: Reviewed in the United States on June 21, 2020
Review: This book was a fantastic read. I could relate to the stories of a strict father with high expectations who said very little. And I can see my grandfather in the quiet man who went about his business and worked hard but wasn’t “warm and fuzzy.” For many years I had a healthy respect/fear of my father, but not a loving relationship. Unfortunately, he passed away long before we could have had the conversation that takes place in this book, but I think he was a man who did the best he could to be a good father and provider...very similar to Larry’s father. This book is a quick ready and definitely worth your time.

 

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