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"Miss Manners with Fangs." ―LA Weekly
We live in a world that's very different from the one in which Emily Post came of age. Many of us who are nice (but who also sometimes say "f*ck") are frequently at a loss for guidelines about how to be a good person who deals effectively with the increasing onslaught of rudeness we all encounter.
To lead us out of the miasma of modern mannerlessness, science-based and bitingly funny syndicated advice columnist Amy Alkon rips the doily off the manners genre and gives us a new set of rules for our twenty-first century lives.
With wit, style,

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Book ID Asin: 1250030714
Book Title: Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck
Book Author: Amy Alkon
Book Format and Price:
Book Format Name: Kindle
Book Format Price: $11.99
Book Format Name: Audiobook
Book Format Price: $0.00
Book Format Name: Paperback
Book Format Price: $17.99
Book Format Name: AudioCD
Book Format Price: $14.99
Book Price: $17.99
Book Category: Books, Humor & Entertainment, Humor and unknown
Book Rating: 318 ratings

Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck by Amy Alkon Book Review

Name: M. T. Crenshaw
Rating: 3.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Likeable and useful but unfocused and preachy
Date: Reviewed in the United States πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ on July 5, 2015
Review: I could not resist the title, and the subject. Any book with the word Fck in the title deserves a bit of attention especially if good manners is the subject. It is a tantalising (or perhaps puzzling) mix. Rudeness is utterly pathetic. The shop attendant at my green grocer says, people who don't return your good morning or hi are like animals. Right there, lady, they are the new cockroaches.Thank Gosh is not just us two.

This is not a book about etiquette but on rudeness in general. Alkon is a versatile writer and uses her own (militant) approach to deal with rude people and rudeness in general. Her recipe is a a very yummy cocktail made of good doses of common sense, good upbringing ways of behaving, sprinkled with some reflections on human behaviour from Behavioural and Evolutionary Psychology, and spiced up with a very witty slap on your face sort of writing.The result is sweet and sour and has hidden cherries in it.

The book's first chapter is terrific, with a reflection on what drives people to be rude. In the chapters that follow she deals with manners and rudeness in different areas of life: communication, neighbourhood relations, Internet, dating and relationships, driving, using public transport, eating in and eating out, apologising, dealing with friends and family with terminal or life-threatening illnesses. The book's last chapter is a chant to those who care, to care more, to see the others as us, to integrate the alienated, to be polite because that connects you with other humans beings, even though you don't know them.

The core of the book is "what really matters isn’t how you set the table or serve the turkey but whether you’re nice to people while you’re doing it". Also, treat others the way you want to be treated. Be Civil. Have empathy. That is it, in a nutshell the core of manners everywhere.

Alkon does not only shares her irritation (which is sometimes very much mine), and does not contain her inner cookie monster (I also have one), but she is also very sound and inquisitive, and there is a mix of serious and funny stuff that makes the book really palatable for any taste. What I like the most about the book is Alkon's relentless belief in the goodness of humanity, on making a difference, and how caring and passionate she is. I share with her my hatred for seat-hogs for example. I thought it was just me :)

Most of what Alkon says is (or should be) common knowledge, so if you don't have manners ore grew up in a family that does not brought up with rules on how to treat other people, you will get more feed from this book that if the contrary is the case.The book is good for very young people, as modern parents have a tendency not to have discipline and to justify the piggishness of their little piggies.

However, I found really great her advice on how to give an apology, how to deal with very sick friends and how to create a community in your neighbourhood. There is some ideas and practical tips about how to deal with hot-potato sort of situations or convey your clear loud message without offending the other person. I also like her advice to email and phone etiquette and how to deal with seat-hogs.

Some of the advice Alkon gives is just applicable to the USA, like restaurant tipping tips and how to proceed when a Police Patrol stops you. They are useful if you are going to travel to the USA, though.

DOWNSIDES
Despite the book being really likeable, there are a few things that rest power to it. Here a few:
> The book shows lack of focus at times, mixing in the same bag things I consider way different even if they are connected: manners, being a caring friend, etiquette, having tact, behaving ethically, liking the internet a lot, or writing reviews on Yelp.
> Etiquette and manners are not universal. Culture and Language do matter, even if we share being Westerners. However, the essence of good manners does not change much. I think the book needed a bit of more reflection on that, or an approach that also includes that. Some of the behaviours she mentions might be considered rude in another part of the world, and some etiquette musts are not etiquette elsewhere. Despite living in a globalised world people tend to live in their own bubbles and consider their own bubble the word. Wake up to the matrix.
> There are too many references to her blogs, her newspaper column, her TV interviews, her radio shows, her famous friends and her boyfriend that are a bit tiring. They are OK in a blog or column. In a book, not so much so.
> Her writing is likeable and enthusiastic but I expected a more polished text and a text that reads less like a blog.
> Alkon preaches a bit and then does not follow what she preaches. For example, her book has as a main aim to be a reminder of how we are all imperfect, we all make mistakes, to have empathy, and to connect with other human beings. What she does? She takes any opportunity to humiliate and name publicly, in person or in her blog/column, some rude people. Althought some recurrent pigs need to be reminder that they are pigs, many of the examples she gives in her book are not of recurrent pigs, just a mistake made somebody. Well, to me if you are rudder than the rude, you are utterly rude not a person with manners. Isn't that easy to see? If you preach empathy and show as if you have none, you are part of the problem.
> Excuses she gives for her being constantly unpunctual, that she is trying, that she is even reading books on it. You just need to get your alarm working and get up or get moving when it sounds, sweetie. For what she says, she is still wasting other people's time consistently. That is utterly rude to me. Is she going to use her anal humiliation approach to combating her rude self?
> She might have manners but she swears too often.
> The formatting of the book in Kindle is generous in the margins, so that makes more pages than they should.
> The index in the Kindle edition does not refer to the Kindle, just to the hard-copy, so it is worthless for Kindle readers..

Name: Beth Cartwright
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: Best Read of the Year
Date: Reviewed in the United States πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ on September 20, 2014
Review: I've bought Amy Alkon's latest book, Good Manners for Nice People Who Sometimes Say F*ck, four times. A hard copy, audiobooks for myself and a friend, and most recently in e-book format so I can take it everywhere. It's that good a read. Ms. Alkon is funny, witty, and her advice, which I first started reading in her syndicated column "The Advice Goddess," is firmly grounded in science. As a student of evolutionary psychology, Ms. Alkon doesn't bother with political correctness - just truths, entertainingly written in her matter-of-fact yet endearing style.

On why it's not shallow, just biology, when a man sees external, not internal beauty, Ms. Alkon's delivers the stingingly funny line, "The penis is not a philanthropic organization and will not get hard because a woman bought a homeless guy a sandwich."

While Ms. Alkon's column is largely geared toward relationship advice, ultimately manners are all about relationships. The book covers dating (or meeting) dos and donts, but also the finer points of all things manners including communication in the digital age, how to be a good neighbor (and what makes a bad one), travel, being a good friend... the book is a roadmap to Not Being A Jerk, but it also tells us how to apologize and fix it when we are.

If you want to know what to do when you realize you've just used your fish fork to eat salad (quelle horror!), this isn't the book you're looking for. If you want to know how to behave in a way that makes you welcome anywhere, pick up a copy of this book post haste!

Name: J. Baker
Rating: 5.0 out of 5 stars
Title: A Modern Guide to Good Manners
Date: Reviewed in the United States πŸ‡ΊπŸ‡Έ on June 16, 2014
Review: An English friend once explained to me that "proper" Brits could not use salt shakers. They had to spoon the salt onto the rim of their plates and transport it to their food with the tip of a knife. That rule changed abruptly when Prince Charles was caught on camera salting his food directly from the shaker, giving the whole country permission to do the same. Perhaps that is how etiquette evolves in a rigid class society, but where do the rest of us go to learn how to live harmoniously with each other long after we have outgrown Miss Manners and Emily Post?

You may not realize how much you need this book until you read it. This sassy, classy, redhead is assertive enough to take on the monumental task of spelling out everything you need to know about how to co-exist with almost eight billion other people without losing your sanity or your humanity. For example: do you know when it's OK to cold call someone? (Never.) When you should leave a voice mail? (Don't.) What to do when stuck in a row of airplane seats with four armrests for six arms? (The two end passengers get one and a half armrests each; the squishee in the middle gets two halves.)

Be prepared to find out some things about yourself that you didn't want to know. Are you a cheapskate who has been under-tipping? A helpful person giving out unwanted advice? Amy is such a talented and entertaining writer that she can say the things your friends won't tell you and do it with such humor and tact that you actually enjoy the process!

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