Baskadia

It’s been a long ride, we have been on the way for close to three hours now, I am already getting dizzy for the third time in a row. the trip has been boring all along. when we first started the journey, all my mum was doing was to talk to me, she has been speaking off my ear for a long while but after I woke up from sleep I realize that she too seems to have been tired of talking, by the way she has been acting, I can tell that she is quite nervous about our changing of environment too, though she is trying to act brave and pretending to also act as if she knows what she is doing, but I can tell that she is never in control of all these, the idea of things seems to have been stressing her out, I am not a guy of many words, even my mum knows that, yet she can’t get herself to keep quiet around me, though she know that I will never give her any reply. I can’t say that I am having a problem having a conversation with another person, It’s just that I am not comfortable with the way people behave, even their speech tells me all about them before we even get to speak with each other, I never had much friends from the place we just left because all of them always looks at me as if I am weird even most of them calls me freak turns out that I’m really not the type that listen to outside talks any conclusion people makes about me I am good with it as far as it doesn’t come to anything physical my mum says to be the only person that understands me yet I cannot say that she is perfect towards me because sometimes I get to see how uncomfortable she is whenever I am around I really pity her though because the way she acts I can tell that she always feels alone whenever both of us are together yet that doesn’t guarantee that she would keep her mouth shut.

The journey has been boring like I said, but it’s just that the environment around us has gotten to my attention after I woke up, we have been passing trees which has stood at the sides of the road, every tree we have passed seems to be in good health as if someone has been taking care of them. I miss my Dad, I really do, he was the one who taught me little I know about trees because he was a florist, who always hangs around the trees, if not because of his demise, we would have remained where we live, I love hanging around him than I do with my mum, I really love and cherish my mum, but I can never stop her from talking, very impressive to see her sleeping beside me right now, at least this would be the only time she can keep her mouth shut, my mother is a sweet mum who really cares and loves me, my Dad once told me that I should always keep her under my protection because she is a child, a grown child I will say, children always talks to people they love, they think that is a way of showing people how much they care about them, that’s exactly my mum’s behavior, she always tries her best to start up a conversation with me which I am really not interested on. me and my Dad can stay a whole day together without speaking to each other, yet we would be very comfortable about it, It amazes me how he also stays with my mum and both of them will be all chatty with each other, I once came to conclusion that my Dad is both an introvert and an extrovert, he was the one who has everything under control, he seems to know everything, before I can even make out to suggest something, he will show me an evidence that he had already taken care of it already.

I never realized that I was bending down, with both of my hands sitting on the driver seat, with my head now resting on my hands, my head was facing outside the window, as I was watching the trees which we have been passing. a drop of water hit me on the knee, I felt it, as if I have been expecting that to happen, I looked at the spot where it fell on my knee as another dropped, now on top of my short, showing a sign that something liquid dropped there, as it spread a little, that isn’t water, that is actually tears, I never realized that I was crying, maybe it’s because of me thinking of my Dad, he is actually the only reason which can make my eyes to get wet. I think I can remember the last time I cried, it was on my dad’s funeral, that was the last time I set my eyes on him physically, my mum was actually the one who lost control that day, she cried like a baby she was, I think I felt how she feels that day, I got my eyes wet that day despite knowing it was never going to bring him back, the truth is that, the tears didn’t come out intentionally, my eyes just went on autopilot, I tried my best to hold back that day, but it was of no use, that day I realized that I can never have control of everything just like my father, he would definitely cry that day if it was my mum who was lying dead, but it would be on his own will, my own tears came down against my will. I immediately brought my eyes out of the car window, I thought I saw something run past us, but I never got to have a clear view of what it was, what I knew is that, it was fast, “ what was that?”, I heard my mum ask beside me,“ it’s nothing, got mistaken a bit ”, I replied as I got myself seated back on my seat.