Baskadia

All my life I've been extra large, plus
   I'm known as a very large fellow.
I would easily pass as a school district bus
   If somebody painted me yellow.
"No secret to losing weight," I've been told.
   "Just cut the fat from your diet."
"Get up and about even if it's cold."
   Once again, I decided to try it.
But jogging was something senseless to me,
   And riding a bike seemed insane.
Joining a gym involved a large fee,
   And lifting weights was a pain.