It's much easier said than done to become a "people person," especially if you don't like to put yourself out there. Still, there's no need to be concerned! It's not about flipping a switch and changing your personality; it's about making small, actionable changes in your daily routine. We've compiled a list of tips, tricks, and ideas to assist you in taking the first step on your journey.
INCREASE YOUR ENTHUSIASM
People who are upbeat and enthusiastic make a better impression. Assume you've just shared some exciting news with a couple of your coworkers. "That's fantastic!" says one. "I'm so happy for you!" exclaims one, while the other responds, "Oh, that's nice." Isn't the first person's reaction much more positive and upbeat? Being a people person is all about making a good impression on those around you and being someone who others enjoy spending time with.
"Kudos!" "Wow, that's incredible!" or "That's so exciting!" are just a few examples of how to inject some extra zeal into your conversations.
Even if you're having a bad day, try to maintain a positive attitude. For example, if you overslept your alarm before going to work, instead of complaining about your bad morning, you could comment on how nice the weather is.
GET RID OF ROBOTIC, AUTOMATED RESPONSES
"I'm fine" is a great way to end a conversation. When someone asks about your day, take a moment to respond honestly. This simple modification can help you get more out of your conversations and connect more deeply with those around you.
"I had my favorite cereal for breakfast today, so my day is going pretty well so far!" you might say. or "I lost track of time last night while reading a great book and only got about 4 hours of sleep." But it was totally worth it!"
CHANGE YOUR TONE
Take note of how you inflect words in a sentence. It's easy for our minds to go on autopilot during everyday conversations. Take a moment to think before you speak as a people person. To avoid sounding condescending by accident, try to speak in an even, consistent tone.
"Did you really do that?" sounds condescending, whereas "Did you really do that?" sounds much friendlier.
ACT EMPATHETICALLY RATHER THAN SYMPATHETICALLY
Empathy emphasizes connection, whereas sympathy is more detached. To be a people person, spend as much time as possible connecting with the people in your life rather than acting as a bystander. A simple shift in your daily responses and reactions can have a significant impact!
For example, instead of saying "That's great to hear," you could say "You must be so excited."
A sympathetic response might be, "That's too bad," whereas an empathetic response might be, "Oh no. You must be extremely disappointed!"
BE AN ATTENTIVE LISTENER
Being a people person, believe it or not, does not entail a lot of talking. It's all about making a good impression and connecting with others in a positive way. Being an active listener is a simple way to accomplish this. Make eye contact with your conversation partner and give them your undivided attention until you've finished speaking.
Make thoughtful remarks throughout the conversation. Throughout the conversation, you could say "Mmm-hmm" or repeat back some of what the other person said.
ASK A LOT OF QUESTIONS
Most people enjoy talking about themselves. When you show a strong interest in another person's life, they begin to find you interesting as well. Throughout the conversation, ask lots of friendly questions—the other person will appreciate your interest. At the end of the day, being a people person is all about making positive connections!
"How was your weekend?" you might inquire. "What are you doing over the holidays?" or "Do you have anything exciting planned?"
KEEP IN MIND THE MINOR DETAILS ABOUT PEOPLE
In a later conversation, bring up those minor details. Being a people person boils down to the smallest details, such as how you connect with others. Take mental notes on minor details in your conversations, even if they appear insignificant at the time. Then, the next time you talk, inquire about the minor detail they mentioned previously.
For example, you could ask a friend how her math test went, or a coworker how their doctor's appointment went.
Make Small Talk With Your Surroundings
Small, pleasant conversations are an excellent way to meet new people. The more people you get along with, the easier it is to become a people person. Try striking up a conversation with a coworker or classmate with whom you don't often speak, and see where it leads.
You could say hello to a classmate or make small talk with the person standing next to you on the subway.
By exchanging business cards, you can make a few professional contacts.
INVITE PEOPLE TO EVENTS
Developing social skills is an excellent way to become a people person. Try inviting your friends and acquaintances to more activities in the coming weeks, such as a professional seminar. Even if they are unable to attend the event with you, they will appreciate the fact that you contacted them.
If you want, you can take baby steps with this! For example, you could email a link to an interesting article to a friend or forward a social media post to them.
SET SPECIFIC GOALS
Small steps can add up to big results over time. Make small, deliberate changes each day that push you out of your comfort zone. It's fine to take your time—after all, baby steps are still progressing!
You might decide to talk to a coworker one day or greet a stranger on the street. What is most important is that you put yourself out there, even if it is in small steps.
BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF
You won't become a people person overnight. Putting yourself out there can be difficult, especially if you prefer to keep to yourself. That's fine! Take it one day at a time and be gentle with yourself.