Baskadia

Family.

When we hear the word “family” what comes to our minds? 

It's unfortunate that many do know not understand what it means to have a family or belong to one. That's not a product of their doing, they're just unfortunate to have been left out. Many have no idea which family they belong to. All they've ever known is that single mother or father who's been responsible for them all of their lives and they have no clue what it takes or means to be among fellow sibling or cousin(s) or an uncle or an Auntie or a grandparent. Many don't even know who their father or mother is talkless of what they looked like. 

No boy or girl is born without the input of two different sexes, coming together whether in agreement or forcefully, consciously or unconsciously to engage in the act that brings forth the child. What is most important at the end of the day is standing up to take responsibility for that act and making sure that the new born is cared for and loved. 

Many don't know how heart breaking it is for a child to be denied parental love and care. But in a situation where the said parent is a product of this same misfortune, they're often left with little or no knowledge of how to love and care for their own child(ren) when they come. It's much better for a child to learn that he or she is an orphan than to learn that the father or mother rejected them to be with another man or woman in quote, or to go live some other life elsewhere apart from the child, or that both parent agreed and decided to put up the child for an adoption because for a reason or the other, they don't want them, maybe just for their looks or whatever reason. In the end, whatever reason that is would be unjustifiable. 

Selfishness runs in every blood. Everyone at some point have had to prioritise themselves above everyone and everything else. This doesn't make us all bad in all cases for there's a need to prioritize ourselves too as much as we do others. But when a child or children or family are involved, then the family should take precedence because the world will raise questions at us at some point if we fail. 

Therefore, one begins to wonder why - given all the above instances - people still get selfish especially when it comes to taking responsibility for their child(ren). I would say reasons abound. To mention just a few: Finance or poverty; Promiscuity of one partner or both; Abuse or violence of a partner or both; Sexual asault on either partner by their partners or anyone else; Bad influence from friends or older person(s) of influence or affluence; Crime; Death or tragic events such as war, natural disaster, plague and many more. All but not limited to these are reasons why people get selfish when it comes to choosing the “family” to themselves.

To so many people who have been a victim of absentee parent or family, they are greatly envied cos it takes a toll on them emotionally and psychologically too. Most of the said victims are responsible for themselves at a very young age and have to learn the survival skill when they're supposed to be cared for and treated like a kid. They miss out on the growth ladder and skip stages such as childhood and adolescents just to learn to survive on their own. Many have lost their lives or gone to prison at a very young age because they don't know better. Many of them deserve pity even in their supposed wicked or heartless states. Cos if you know what they lacked maybe you'd be willing to provide them with those things. 

Everyone can thrive where there's love and peace and happiness.  I’ve see people flourish and do in the absence of comfort and food, all they had was love and peace and they produced great results. All we can only give love today, and see the whole world as one big family. Maybe all these mayhem will halt for a second and peace be still.